Gym Wear

They say the clothes make the man – but that’s not really true, is it? I say the man makes the clothes. And to make sure those clothes fit, you gotta be in shape. So that’s what I want to talk about the day – gym wear!

And yes, I know what you’re thinking – I already have to think about what I’m wearing to watch sports, I have to watch what I wear to the gym now too?

Well, yes and no.

Yes, there are some broad guidelines I would recommend for all you fellas gettin’ your fitness on. No, you don’t have to dress for the gym, but if you’re bothering to show up at all (and a big slow clap for those of you who are), it can’t hurt to look good while you’re there. Amirite? Of course I am.

Let’s start at the top and work our way down, shall we?

Shirts

I’m far from the greenest girl on the block, but I do believe in recycling t-shirts. That tee you got for the 5k you ran a few years back? Wear it ‘til it falls apart. I’ve said it here before, but with clothes, oftentimes, the more worn-in (read: loved) your clothes look, the better.

Exception: Frat t-shirts. You teamed up with Pi Phi your sophomore year for a car wash? Nobody cares. Get rid of it.

I can’t work out in anything but a beater, so this may sound hypocritical, but I prefer a guy with a little upper-arm modesty at the gym. If you want to cut the sleeves off your tees, or if you prefer UnderArmour tanks, that’s your prerogative. But if I mistake you for a new cast member on Jersey Shore’s second season, well, don’t say I didn’t warn you. And if the meathead, ‘look at my big muscles’ look is what you’re going for, well, this column’s probably not for you anyway.

Shorts

Shorts are all about happy mediums – not too short or too long, not too tight or too baggy. I live in my brother’s old basketball shorts from his middle school days, and I can’t think of anything more comfortable or effortlessly stylish (for guys or girls) than a nice mesh short at the gym. Soccer shorts run the risk of showing off a little too much leg and running shorts belong at the finish line of a marathon. No matter what you’re doing, you can’t go wrong doing it in basketball shorts.

Socks

You didn’t think I’d forget socks, did you? C’mon, I’m all about the details. This one’s easy – go for ankle socks (that don’t peek out of your shoes) or tall tube socks. Anything in between, and you risk a cankle. Yes, guys get them too.

Shoes

I am not a shoe nazi, and I don’t think most gym shoes fall along a hip/unhip continuum, so you’re pretty much off the hook here. Just watch how you wear them – there’s no need for laces that require humongous bunny ear loops, nor should you try to act all cool and wear them with loose, tongue sticking out. You won’t look so cool when you sprain your ankle when your shoe flies off on the treadmill.

That’s it! And once again, I want to big up (I’ve always wanted to big up someone, did I do it right?) my male readers who will put this advice to good use at the gym.

You like us to look good, well, it works both ways. Yeah, yeah, girls love saying they’re just looking for a “nice guy with a sense of humor,” but if he’s telling jokes with a (relatively) flat stomach and good-sized guns, well, all the better.

xx, megan
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The bolo tie…

Sitting on the subway the other night, I caught the eye of a cute, mop-haired fellow. He nodded approvingly at the Jonathan Safran Foer novel in my hands. I gave an admiring once-over to the artfully-beaten up leather messenger bag at his feet.
Then, the passenger standing in front of him shifted, and I got a better look at my object of admiration. What I saw has wracked me nightmares ever since our encounter. Mop Hair was wearing…A BOLO TIE.

That’s right. I’d fallen prey to the misleading wiles of The Hipster, a common specimen in my ‘hood. Boyishly handsome, but more interested in looking different than looking good.

This kid did not need a ridiculously out-of-date tie to get me to notice him. His sparkling eyes did that. As did his excellent taste in literature. His neckwear, however, brought to mind my grandpa, who wore his own bolo tie with a pin commemorating the submarine he manned in WWII. When I think of my grandpa wearing a bolo tie, it puts a smile on my face. When I think of someone my age in the same getup, it puts an upturned nose and a grimace on my face. Let me ask you: do you want the ladies to look at you with an upturned nose and a grimace? I didn’t think so.

The trend du jour will differ depending on your locale: maybe where you live, Ed Hardy’s still (inexplicably) in style. Perhaps all your friends sport uber-baggy jeans to show off their (probably fake) Gucci belts. In my city, it’s hipsters in wacky hats, Cuban Heels and ridiculous neckwear.
So here’s my advice to all the guys who think they need extra help standing out to the ladies: Stop trying so hard!

My disclaimer, if said “flair” is totally your thing – i.e., if that Ed Hardy shirt belonged to your best friend who died in a tragic hair gel accident, or if your favorite plaid cap comes from your family clan’s tartan pattern, fine. FINE. Wear it, and wear it with pride, but if you see a girl wrinkle her nose at you and turn away when you try to give her a wink, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
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Bi-polar dressing

Today I want to talk about a style blunder I see guys make all too often, but luckily is easy to fix: bi-polar dressing.

Now, I'm not talking about mixing stripes with paisley, or sporting a black belt with brown shoes. Those are small fries to this big potato of a problem. I'm talking about the all-too-familiar faux pas of an outfit having one “look” from the waist-up, and a whole ‘nother from the waist down.
At a friend’s apartment last weekend, I performed an impromptu style consultation targeting this easily correctable offense. My friend, who I'll call Walter (because that's his real name and I kind of love it) was all dressed up for a night on the town, but his outfit just…wasn’t working. On top, Walter was wearing a track jacket, henceforth known as a tracket, with a gray t-shirt underneath. Below that, he had on jeans (with visible-stitch front pockets, an offense meriting a post of its own)...and dress shoes.
Black dress shoes with a tracket. Just the thought sends shivers down my cashmere-covered spine.
Why guys? Why do you confuse us with your mixed message dressing? Walter's top half said, I just came from a leisure afternoon activity and decided to pop over to the neighborhood bar to meet some friends for a pint, while his bottom half shouted, So! Do you come to this techno-thumping nightclub often?
Walter – who, on top of being named Walter had the unlucky fate to be born a ginger – is a really nice guy, so I couldn't let him walk out the door in this condition.

I dragged him to his closet and pulled out two easy options to re-work his wardrobe: (1) change out of the dress shoes and into a pair of spotless New Balances, or (2) keep the shoes and trade the tracket for a dress shirt. I argued for the former, as the button-down/jeans/black shoes combo always strikes me as a little generic. The tracket wasn't bowling me over either – the tropical pattern across the chest had me humming the Beach Boys’ “Kokomo” as I dug into his closet – but at least it had personality.
I left for another party (what can I say? I’m a social girl) before Walter decided if he wanted to dress up or dress down, but I felt good just knowing I spread the word about the importance of single-minded dressing. As a wise man once said, “Suit up.” And if that suit is a track suit, so be it. As long as what’s happening above the belt matches what’s going on below, we’re all good.

xx,

Megan
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Sporting Style

Showing your team spirt doesn’t mean looking like a mascot who wandered into the stands. With the Saints’ Super Bowl victory fresh in my mind, and March Madness right around the corner, it’s no surprise I’m in a sporty mood this week. As such, I’d like to take this opportunity to address the clothing choices of male sports fans.

If you’re like most guys I know (apologies for my gross generalization, by the way), you love sports. And one of the things you may love about sports is that you don’t have to think about what you wear – when you play them or when you watch them. In recent years, though, “sporting fashion” has become another opportunity to show off your stuff, and trust me, sports-loving ladies are noticing.


Image viainsidecatholic.com

Paparazzi snap pics of Jay-Z and Leonardo DiCaprio sitting courtside at Lakers games. David Beckham gets photographed walking to practice in sweats and a flannel tied around his waist, and a trend is born. Ryan Seacrest reported from the “red carpet” at this year’s Super Bowl, for God’s sake! Even if your presence in the stands doesn’t result in a full-page spread in Us Weekly, you should still care about how you look when cheering on your team.

First, the Don’ts:
-Jerseys are acceptable at sporting events (or sporting event-related functions) ONLY. The players don’t wear their jerseys off-duty; neither should you.
-Please don’t paint your faces. Girls don’t want to kiss guys wearing more makeup than them.
-Wind pants have not been cool since the seventh grade. Take note.
-Non-hooded sweatshirts are kind of whiskey tango. Just sayin’.
-Sports apparel should be well-loved. If I can see the creases from where the shirt was previously folded on the table at Foot Locker, I will immediately question your fanliness (like manliness, get it?! Well I thought it was funny…).

Now a couple Do’s, because I don’t want you to think I’m all rules and no fun:
-I love a man in a baseball cap repping his favorite team. The more beat-up, the better.
-If you don’t own any apparel touting the team you’re rooting for (say, alumni weekend at your girlfriend’s alma mater), wear something in their colors. It’s thoughtful, and you won’t stand out if you show up on the Jumbotron
-The best thing you can do to look good in sports fashion? Play sports! You like us ladies to look good, well it doesn’t come easy. Work out, and we’ll want to watch you work it out.

Go State!

xx,

Megan
If you have a style question, just email me at
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Introducing Megan K Collins…your Style Girlfriend

Jon asked me to provide a female point of view on men’s style, and as I love to say what I think – even when I probably shouldn’t – well, here I am.

A little about me and my style:
Born and raised in the Midwest, I now live in New York City and work in advertising. Both my job and adopted hometown lend themselves to having fun with fashion. And when I need inspiration, the city provides me with an endless supply of always-interesting people watching.

Probably the most impactful era in my own evolution of style, however, would have to be my high school and college tenure working at Abercrombie & Fitch. That’s right. I wore tennis skirts and flip-flops in the middle of December, and I’m proud of it. Thankfully, I’ve weaned myself off A&F, but the preppy part of me is still strong. A friend the other day described my style as Reese Witherspoon meets Diane Kruger, and I think that’s about right. I’m open to new trends but not a slave to them. For example, I say yes to leggings, but an emphatic NO to high-waisted jeans.

Now a little about my “type” so you know my guy style biases:

I like short hair. I like boat shoes, though I’ve never actually dated anyone who wore them. I like when a guy puts effort into his look, even when I might not agree with the results. I don’t like when guys wear their jeans skinnier than I do, and I don’t want him to be prettier than me either.
In short, I like a guy to look like a guy, albeit one that didn’t pick a shirt up off the floor this morning, take a whiff and pull it on with a shrug, but also one that didn’t spend a half hour in front of the mirror perfecting his ‘casually’ rolled-up sleeves.

The fancy stuff I’ll leave to Jon – he can tell you how long a cuff should be, where the break in a nice pair of pants should hit and settle the age-old question: bow tie v. ascot when you’re trying to look pretentious. I’m here to give you my take on how you look, and what I’d like to see you in that you’re not wearing already.

xx,
Megan
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